Thinking about moving from the US to the UK with teens? Here’s what we wish we had known before moving abroad with our kids.
Drinking Culture
If you are moving to the UK with teens, be aware that the drinking culture in the UK is quite different from that in the US.
Many Europeans find it surprising that Americans can’t legally drink until 21, which seems completely normal to us. However, some aspects of UK drinking culture might be just as eye-opening for Americans.
Europeans often comment on how shocking it is that Americans cannot drink until 21, something that is just normal to us. But many Americans may find aspects of UK drinking culture just as surprising.
Legal Drinking Age
In the UK, as in most of Europe, there is a more relaxed attitude towards drinking.While the legal age to purchase alcohol is 18, when children are allowed to consume alcohol with parental consent is much less clear.
The official law on the Home Office website referring to alcohol consumption simply states that it is illegal to give alcohol to children under 5!
In fact, throughout much of the UK it is legal for children between the ages of five and seventeen to drink some alcohol at home, or on other private premises (such as a friend’s house).
Drinking Culture in Secondary School
In the US, strict laws govern the supply of alcohol to minors, and parents are held legally responsible for their children’s actions while under the influence.
In contrast, children in the UK often begin drinking at a much younger age, with the average age for having their first full drink being around 13 or 14.
When our younger teen started school in the UK at 14, right in the middle of Year 10, we noticed that many of her friends’ parents would buy alcohol for their teens during gatherings, which took us by surprise at first.
Before long, we came to expect that alcohol would be present at almost every party our daughter attended.
However, I was not prepared when she was offered alcohol at a party with our UK friends!
However, I wasn’t prepared for the moment she was offered alcohol at a party with our UK friends! While visiting close friends, a shot of vodka was unexpectedly placed in front of her at the dinner table. She didn’t like it and left most of it untouched. When our hostess noticed, she quickly made her a mixed drink in hopes that it would be more to her liking.
Since it’s not a matter of if, but when, your teens will be offered alcohol, it’s wise to have a conversation beforehand to establish a plan that everyone feels comfortable with.
Drinking Culture at Uni
While drinking moderate amounts of alcohol may be common all over Europe, binge-drinking is especially common and problematic in the UK.
On weekends, it’s not unusual to see groups on trains chugging beers as they gear up for a long weekend of partying in the city.
When our daughter turned 18 and started university in England, we noticed that many school-led activities took place either at the student union (essentially a pub on campus) or at nearby bars.
“Freshers Week” is organized by the universities to welcome the first year students to campus, and it felt like one big week-long pub-crawl. While we accepted that our daughter could legally drink, it was strange that all of a sudden she was able to go to bars and clubs.
We had our concerns, but we also had open conversations about how to stay safe. Most importantly, we discussed the risks associated with heavy alcohol consumption.
It’s crucial for parents moving to the UK with teens to set clear expectations regarding alcohol, while also recognizing that this is a different country with its own cultural norms.
Getting Around
A huge plus (in my opinion) to living in England is that you will almost certainly spend much less time in your car!
In the morning and afternoon, you will see kids from of all ages taking the train/bus to school. Between 3-4pm, there are hordes of school kids crowding the streets in their British school uniforms (looking very posh to an American, I might add).
On the weekends, kids walk or take public transportation to meet up with friends. It’s very rare that I drive my kids anywhere anymore.
When we moved to England, our older daughter had been driving for two years. Giving up her car was definitely a sacrifice. She loved the freedom of having a car and she was nervous about giving up that up.
But when she made friends she found that many Brits wait until their early 20s to start driving. Not only because getting a license is a bit more of a hassle in the UK, but because public transportation is so good. Young adults also have access to railcards, giving them 30%-50% off standard train fares.
Despite driving later, teens in the UK seem to be more independent at an earlier age.
Our 14-year-old and her friends regularly take the bus to the coast and the train to Scotland. Our older daughter starting going to mainland Europe with her friends when she was barely 18.
That level of independence was an adjustment for us, but I think it has been great for our teens.
In the US, I would have been nervous about my daughter walking to the bus stop alone early in the morning, especially during winter when sunlight is scarce. But in England, that’s just the way it is.
While I don’t know if the streets of England are any safer, I do know that walking home from school on cobbled streets in the fresh air, past English gardens and historic buildings, is good for just about anyone—teens included!
Transitioning to Schools in the UK
Navigating the UK school system can be one of the most stressful parts of moving to the UK with teens. A little preparation and research can make the transition much easier on everyone.
When we began to research our move to England, we were told by many people that it would be “impossible” to transition to the British school system as teens.
This is because UK students are preparing to take high-stakes exams that will ultimately determine where and what they can study.
I am not going to go into extensive detail here, but if your child or teen is going to be enrolling in a British school, they will need to be aware of these exams.
GCSE and A-Level Examinations
Because the cost for uni is capped for UK residents, the competition to get into the best schools cans be fierce! British kids start preparing for university for when they are barely teens, deciding early what they will study for their GCSE exams and then A-level exams.
At around age 16, British students take the the General Certificate of Secondary Education (GCSE). This is an academic qualification taken in Year 11 that determines where and what students can study in years 12 and 13 (college/sixth form).
During Years 12 and 13, students will spend two years studying to take Advanced level qualifications (A levels), which they need in order to enter university. Remember that “college” and “university” do not mean the same thing as they do in the US.
It’s hard to overstate how much time is spent preparing for these exams, and how stressful they are for many families. With that in mind, it’s understandable that people warned me about transitioning to school in the UK with teens.
However, I don’t agree that it’s impossible. In fact, we did it!
If your teen is transitioning to school in the UK when students are taking these exams (around 16 for GCSEs and 18-19 for A-Levels), you will definitely want to spend some time preparing.
A good place to start is to purchase study guides (no financial relationship) that include the topics covered and practice exam questions. They may take a few weeks to cross the pond, but it will be worth the wait!
In fact, one of the best things that we did to prepare our teen to move to England was purchase a revision (study) guide for her year. She had a few months to look it over and felt much more prepared when she entered her new UK school.
Remember, if you are finding the transition to UK schools overwhelming, there are American schools and online schools that cater to expat families. You can also homeschool!
School Uniforms
If you’re wondering if your teen will get to wear one of those Harry Potter-esque uniforms, the answer is YES!
All British school children are required to wear uniforms until Year 12, when they enter college or sixth form. There is generally still a dress code, but it is much more relaxed than the ties and blazers of the lower years.
School Sports
School sports are not at all what they are in the US. You will find that schools offer far fewer, if any, organized sports.
For many American families school sports are a big part of their lives, and this presents a big change. While school sports are few, there are plenty of opportunities for kids to get involved in local organized sports.
Rowing teams are something that many British children get participate in after school and on the weekends.
In fact, many rowing clubs offer options for all ages, including non-competitive options. If your kids love sports, it’s a great way to meet that need while also getting a chance to experience an important part of British culture.
Netball teams and running clubs are also very popular!
Physical Education in Primary and Secondary School
Another point worth mentioning is that British school kids play very different games at recess and in PE than American kids. On our daughter’s first day of PE, she caught hell for not having the slightest clue how to play rounders.
If I had known, I would have taken some time to make her familiar with common games played in the UK such as rounders, rugby, and netball.
Another way to prepare your teens for moving to England is to look at the national curriculum for PE to see what they’ll be covering that year.
Going University
University Fees
If you are moving to the UK with teens, it’s never too soon to start thinking about university.
Even though the competition for top spots at university can be fierce, many schools give preference to international students due to the higher tuition they pay.
We moved to the UK when my daughter was 17-years-old. Even though we were living the UK, she entered uni as an international student, and was not required to take A-Level exams (thank goodness).
When choosing where were going to live, we spent time researching locations that had nearby universities with lower fees for international students. If your teen will be entering uni within three years of your arrival, and cost is a consideration, this will be an important step in planning your move.
Qualifying for Resident Tuition
The cost of university is capped at under £10,000 for UK students that qualify for home fees. You will need to be an ordinary resident of the UK for three years before your kids will qualify for UK resident tuition.
Fees for international students can be significantly more and vary greatly.
Even if money is no object, before moving to the UK with teens, you may want to think about what universities are in the area when choosing a place to settle.
If your children are joining you in the UK on a dependent visa, rather than a student visa, they can remain on the visa after turning 18 only if you are financially supporting them.
Moving from American to England with teens presents some challenges, but it’s also an invaluable gift to them. Your kids will be old enough to understand and remember this unique and rare experience.
Was your 17 year old daughter in high school when you moved, or did she already have a diploma. Can one get into University without GCSEs, A levels, or a diploma from a US high school?
Hi! Our older daughter was 17.5 and in her senior year when we moved. Figuring out school for her was certainly challenging. In the end, we decided that moving to England was an education in itself, and she finished that last semester through homeschool following her US school’s curriculum. You can definitely get into uni without GCSEs and A-levels, as tons of international students do every year, but applying without a high school diploma might be a different story. I would imagine you would need to have either the UK secondary qualifications OR a high school diploma and SAT scores. If you have an idea of where she would like to study, I would reach out to their admissions department.